The weekend went by too fast as it always does but it went well with lots of inspiration. Today I want to write about self-love as essential to feeling ok about yourself and needed if you want to genuinely love others.
There are two common myths spread about self-love. One is that self-love is the sign of a big ego. The opposite of that is true; self-love shrinks the need for a dominating ego. Second is that self-love is self-centered. Without self-love people can become self-centered because they don’t feel ok with who them are. If you love yourself, you have much more love to give others. Self-love is so important at so many levels.
Self-love keeps on coming up as a theme with my clients and people in my life. In my work as a therapist, I know all my clients would benefit from a big dose of self-love. I wish it came in the form of a vitamin like a Vitamin L for self-love. Then I could have a big supply on hand and give them doses when needed. I suspect we would all do well with a one-a-day dose of self-love.
Since there is no Vitamin L and since self-love is so important I want to share with you fifteen positive ways to find self-love.
- Mindfulness – this is a simple practice that takes self-discipline and a willingness to bring your focus to self-awareness throughout your day. Be mindful and accepting of yourself and self-love will grow. Peace Is Every Step by Thich Nhat Hahn is a wonderful book about mindfulness
- EFT – Emotional Freedom Techniques, which is also known as tapping is a simple but very useful techniques to offset old negative programming. Checkout EFT at Youtube.com where there are many examples of how to do this technique.
- Mirror Work – Louise Hay a famous teacher and healer has an exercise that is very powerful. Each morning stand (without clothes) in front of a mirror and affirm that you totally love and accept yourself.
- Caring For Your Body – make sure you take good care of your body including watching your weight, eating healthy, exercise, stretching, and lots of rest. If you feel good in your body, you will feel accepting of yourself.
- Positive Thoughts – If you thoughts and self-talk are positive, supportive and encouraging, you will find it much easier to love yourself. Your inner dialogue shapes your experience of yourself.
- Pay Attention To Your Feelings – feelings flow through you throughout your day and if you acknowledge what you feel and can be accepting of these feelings you can love yourself. All feelings are ok. Stuffing or denying feelings is not healthy.
- Stop All Judging – the mind is a judging machine that places everything under the categories of “good” or “bad”. Judging of self can often make you feel unlovable. Cease all judging and instead open your heart.
- Live With Purpose – a purposeful life feels positive and meaningful. When you live with purpose you are alive, focused and energized. Loving yourself is easier when you are living with purpose.
- Find Your Spirit - you have a spiritual nature. This higher nature is beyond the story/drama of who you are. Your spirit is infinite with endless possibilities and potential
- Open Your Heart – self-love takes an open, caring and kind heart towards self. Opening your heart means accepting and trusting yourself fully even in the midst of your human imperfections. Loving yourself is possible when you have compassion for who you are.
- Be Patient – The journey back to self-love can take some time and focus. Sit back, take a few deep breaths and let yourself slowing become aquainted with the beauty and wonder of who you are.
- Step Back and Observe – if you can learn to develop impartiality towards yourself, you will become free enough to love and fully express who you are. The more you can observe and watch yourself with a spacious heart, the more self-love is possible.
- Let Go And Forgive – the past is over and sometimes the hardest person to forgive in you. Forgiving you is essential to feeling positive about yourself. To not forgive is to build resentments which make you feel distant from yourself and the world.
- Live Today Fully – today is all you have and if you live it as fully as you can, you will feel good about yourself and you life. Self-love only exists in the now.
- Serve Others - caring and kindness towards others enriches your sense of self. The more compassion you can have for those around you, the more you will feel love for who you are and what you do.